Stonewalled

In recent days, I feel that I have been stonewalled by B and D.

The last text response I received from B was, "I am now overseas." Fair enough that I found out he went on a diving trip but he was able to share pics with uncle L and have chats with uncle L but not me. Thinking back, with regards to our online mobile communication, I might have offended him by sending too many pics and clips that his phone memory could not handle and due to the manner in which he communicated/threatened to leave the chat, I left the chat group first. Also, he gave me some discount pamphlet which I had passed on to EK and I do not know if he felt offended by that or not. Perhaps he just need time to sort out his own time and space and emotions. Likewise, I should do that. It is good for me to be detached from him, before any deeper bonds are formed.

Meanwhile, D and I have not been able to meet up regularly for lunch this year anymore. Partly, due to the fact that she is working at her father's office and her hours are no longer as flexible. Also, due to the developing COVID-19 situation since 23 January, I have been going home for lunch. It was due to me calling off an agreed upon evening appointment, due to mum and sis's worries and concerns because of the COVID-19 situation, that left D fuming. Since then, she has ignored my texts. Perhaps, it is also time for me to re-evaluate my friendship with her. Good time for me to detach myself from deeper bonds with her too.

Perhaps it is time in my life to make space for more positive people who will be more up-lifting, inspiring, people I look up to, rather than to be around people whom I know "sorta admire" me for one reason or another. Better yet, I hope to find relationships that are mutually engaging and up-lifting and less one-sided. I guess in life, it may never be quite possible to have relationships without a trace of any abusive traits, partly because I may be triggered to be the abusive party or I may trigger the other person to be abusive. But, I still must try to be Christlike and find people who aspire to be like Jesus to me, so I can be like Jesus to them too. Even if my friends do not aspire to be Christlike, I need to love them still, no? But at certain junctures, I need space, to avoid getting unnecessarily wounded or hurt. I need to learn to be wise with my limited time and energy.

Dec, Jan, Feb

Just realised that I had not a single post since December before my post in March. I missed my usual Birthday Post, Christmas Post, New Year's Post. I wonder what happened?

Nonetheless, I had a very lovely birthday tea at the newly refurbished Raffles Hotel with mum on my actual birthday, my 45th. I met up with V who treated me to a very sumptuous, scrumptious and all round yummillicious Cantonese set lunch for two at Yan, a Cantonese restaurant at the National Gallery. It was an exquisite lunch experience which we both enjoyed tremendously. I shared the experience with C who then went on to give her dad a birthday treat at the same restaurant a couple of weeks later. Even though I was glad she was also able to enjoy a good lunch with her dad, I felt a strange sense of a unique experience being imitated or copied. Perhaps on the positive note, imitation is the highest flattery. Or could it be that God is teaching me to be 1) more big-hearted 2) more discerning who I share my experiences with 3) both.

Well, then V treated me to a baking class at ABC cooking studios near Christmas as a Christmas gift. When I shared pics of the chantilly snow white cake I baked, B requested for the recipe. I was happy to share, although she wanted a PDF version rather than a screenshot of it. Oh well, I try my best to please a good buddy. Also, I felt a bit bad that I got to go for it, but she did not, as she wanted to attend the class with her teenage son but somehow mixed up the dates. I wonder why I feel bad. I should not feel responsible for other people's mistakes but sometimes I do. Too responsible for the wrong things.

During year end, my friend IT and I had a sleepover in JB. Oh, before that, Lu had a sleepover at Meadow Spring and it was really lovely. She read me "The Tailor of Gloucester" by Beatrix Potter as a bedtime story. We were both twinning in Totoro tees as sleepwear as well. It was just wonderful to be able to have heart to heart talk with a dear sister and confidante in Christ. Someone wiser, kinder, more Christlike than me. Someone I look up to. :) Someone I'll pray the best for with all of my heart too. But I digress. The sleepover in JB with IT was great fun too. We had coconut drinks with my mum by a roadside stall near my home and we went to a new mall near my home too. Best part was she was not intimidated by Brownie at all. :)

Jan went by pretty quickly as I recalled. I entered the year 2020 together with G and YL again at Faith Methodist Church's watchnight service. We had New Year's Day lunch at the cafeteria of Seletar Airport. Some local indian muslim cuisine we had. I think G had muturbak for the first time in her life! The kumpung fried rice was so good that both G and YL decided to dapao back that day. Lunch was C+G (Cheap and Good)!

CNY came along in the end of Jan as did the threat of Coronavirus which soon became known as COVID-19. By Feb, I requested to Work From Home for a week, till things calmed down a bit. And it is already the first week of March now! How fast!

Be with someone

I came across this quote, "Be with someone
who will sit with you and say, "Let's fix this" instead of
being a child and ignoring you.

Someone came to mind straightaway. Someone who has been ignoring me.

I really should take this as a sign that this someone is "being a child" and is not someone I should be with.

Malacca Trip

Last Thursday night, mum, sis and I travelled to JB and on Friday we drove to Malacca. Sis and I had dinner at this quaint little cafe called Stolen Cup along Jonker Street while mum rested at Pines Hotel at night. The next morning, I had food poisoning from the buffet breakfast. I got a jab from the nearby clinic to stop my vomitting. Also, I rested in the hotel for the rest of the day, while mum and sis went to visit my 90+ year old aunty. That evening we caught a spectacular performance of Encore Melaka, Impression Series. That was a real visual feast. By Sunday, we had to travel back to JB and on Monday, return to Singapore. I caught up with Ee Leng at Regent Hotel for an afternoon tea to have a belated birthday celebration with her.

In another week's time or so, I am planning to go to Malacca with mum again, to run some errands.

Korea and Shanghai Holidays

Two weeks ago at this time, sis and I have just touched down at Jeju Island for the first time of our lives. It has been a memorable trip to Korea and Shanghai for sis and I. We viewed beautiful autumn colours in the mountains, made kimchi and Ginseng chicken together. We also went to one day Red Ginseng Spa which was loads of fun. At Jeju itself, the most delightful visit was to Joanne Bear Museum. We also visited the theme park called Everland and there were beautiful flowers there. It has been over fifteen years ago since I last visited Shanghai. The cityscape of Shanghai has changed. A lot more skyscrapers have shot up. We even went up to the 100 storeys high Shanghai World Financial Center. The night view was stunning from up there. I'm truly grateful for my friends who prayed for my sis and I during the trip. We got along well enough and had minimal conflicts throughout the trip. Praise God.

1st Post in October

My 29th Baptism Anniversary on 7 October went by rather uneventfully. It was a Monday and I was in JB. I managed to get the car fixed up - re-filled the air-conditioning coolant and sprayed painted parts of the car that had scratches here and there. RM140 for the air-con coolant thingy and RM250 for the paint. Total damage was RM390. Converted to SGD would be around $130. Upkeep of a car is no joke but definitely cheaper to do so in JB methinks.

I had lunch with mum at the Penang Cendol restaurant in Mid Valley in JB that day and did some errands getting some blueberries jams and eyedrops. Tuesday was again rather uneventful, except for homecooked dinner at Bishan. Mum cooked some yummy pigs trotters I think. Wednesday was when Alice, ST and the girls (Elsa and Illary) and I met up at the Chicken Rice Restaurant at Thomson Road for dinner - Nam Kee Chicken Rice Restaurant. This restaurant is one that I have frequented since I was a child, like Illary's age or even younger. It must have been around for 30+ to 40+ years. I was glad to share the yummy childhood authentic hainanese dishes there with them.

After the dinner, we adjourned to Alice's hotel room at JEN hotel, at Tanglin Mall. It was a fun time while the girls played with their new Nintendo game which Alice bought for them.

Oh, I forgot to mentioned that my family had a lovely birthday celebration for my nephew Josh last Saturday on 5 October 2019. It was his 6th birthday and EH ordered a really adorable bear-shaped birthday cake for him which we all adored. B booked a chalet apartment at Changi Village Civil Service Club and we had the cake there. We also had a sumptuous dinner at The Coastal Settlement restaurant nearby.

Last night, I had a long chat on the phone with Charis. It was nice to just catch-up with her on the phone. D's stint at Subway has ended. Next Tuesday, Uncle L, Aik Ghee and Chin Hong will be having a farewell lunch for Chin Hong at Manle - a Teochew Porridge Buffet lunch - looking forward to that.

Also, looking forward to autumn tour in Korea with sis coming up end of the month from 24 Oct to 2 Nov.

Evening Post on 10 Sep

Today is the tenth day of September. September is my sister's (2nd Sep) and my nephew Sam's birthday (20th Sep) month. Today is cch's birthday and tomorrow, 9/11 is Imel's birthday. I have quite a number of friends who are September babies. Stella Leong (4th Sep), Sng Lee Lee (5th Sep), Chew Li Ping (18th Sep) and I think Meirong's daughter Peace (18th Sep), Uda and her twin sister Ude, Pat and her twin sister Iris, and JC classmates Gayle and Margaret too. I think my colleages Karen and Aik Ghee, and an alumni Htike as well. What a lot of September babies I know.

During lunchtime today, I visited SGX Centre for the first time. Attended a seminar on Blockchain and enjoyed a free buffet lunch there with B. There was free flow coffee and tea too. B has a new nick today - Snorlax. That is because of the strong resemblance between them.

Michele from Perth sent me news that the pots which I have stored for her in JB are now considered mine. They are gifts from her as she does not see herself returning to this part of Asia anytime soon.

My sis' birthday was celebrated with a sumptuous birthday lunch at Xi Yan, along Maxwell Road, on 1 Sep. On the actual day, mum, sis and I went to Mid Valley in JB from morning till late afternoon and enjoyed a makan trail there. In fact, each of us got a new piece of clothing too. And sis treated herself to hair treatment at the salon in SOGO. Dinner was had at Prego, in Raffles City, next to Fairmont Hotel. It was a lovely birthday celebration for sis without any occurrence of major tiffs or arguments. Peaceful and joyful. Much to thank the Lord for.

About 25th August

I sent out three birthday greetings on 25th August - I, K and T. I received replies from I and K but heard nothing back from T. I was supporting T financially until I had to pay my own mortgage. I think our friendship/relationship went downhill after my support for him/his family stopped. It is rather unfortunate. My friendship with I and K started in my Uni days in Perth... close to 20 years ago. I has two lovely boys and K two adorable girls. Yesterday, I went to the courts to settle her divorce with J. It was a sad day for her but I hope it is the end of a chapter and the beginning of another good chapter ahead soon.

B's birthday celebration lunch

It was an all you can eat Suki-ya buffet lunch at Bugis + to celebrate Ah B's 52nd birthday. He was wearing his favourite red orchid shirt. It's either his favourite or he must have a few of that similar designs. A and I arrived at about the same time as B. Uncle L went to collect the mango birthday cake from Polar. Uncle C and N came along soon after. What a lot of food we had for lunch. We started off with a birthday blessing from our Alumni Chaplain for B. Part deux of the celebration was back at the EAST office where we had cake and coffee. We lit the cake with five candles using the lighter which we borrowed from the security guard uncle David. Uncle L prayed another birthday blessing upon B before we sang him a Happy Birthday song. :D

I think his lunch and cake celebration has been quite a success. I certainly hope he enjoyed it with our company as much as we did his. B was very kind and generous to give us a treat on his birthday. :D

Late night post on 21 August

Just a year ago, I remember celebrating B's 51st birthday at Pastoral View with a hotpot dinner gathering and a Lana chocolate cake. It was fun and memorable for me. I hope it was so for him too. Tomorrow, I get to have a birthday lunch with B - another hotpot gathering, at Bugis + Suki-ya restaurant this time, together with uncle L, N, A and C. I got him a 3XL Bigfoot made in Blangadesh tee-shirt as a gift. Hope it fits him.

Looking forward to tomorrow's celebration.

On a separate note, my 4S2 class has formed a WhatsApp chat group initiated by S Chen. Fabulous idea and great way for us to keep in touch, get connected and be all prepped to attend Founder's Day Dinner on 25 July 2020 for our class reunion as it will be our 30th anniversary since graduation. Another event to look forward to next year. :D

This afternoon, we had ladies fellowship at Sumire Yakitori Japanese restaurant at Bugis Junction. It was S, K, A and me. We shared about highlights for our week, month and some lessons we would like to pass on to our children, or those closest to us. K shared about her visit with her family to Jewel, A shared about a similar visit too, S shared about her birthday buffet celebration at Jen hotel where the noodles were bland but the desserts were good. I shared about watching the NDP Preview from the grandstand with L's family this year - a first for me, an experience that was truly memorable.

As for life's lessons, K shared about teaching her children to never give up. A shared about teaching about resilience, thrift and creativity. S shared about how life is a learning journey. I shared about how important is it to put God as a priority.

1st Post on 1st August

Seven months have gone by in 2019 and this is the beginning of August. August is my dad's birthday month. If papa is still around, we would be celebrating his 82nd birthday at Ah Orh Seafood Restaurant this Saturday. Nonetheless, the family will still be heading there for a commemorative meal in remembrance of papa's favourite Teochew steamed fish. I gather it will be a rather hectic Saturday for me. There is a 2pm Ordination Service at Immaunuel Christian Church off Alexander Road. I will be getting five hand bouquets and doing the photography for the service. Praying that everything runs smoothly.

Besides August being Papa's birthday, 3rd is also P and R's birthday. 7th is HW. 30th is KW and 31st is N. 22nd is A, B and E. 25th is I & her siblings, K and T. Plus 9th is Singapore's 54th birthday too! What a celebratory month August is.